Tell me lies…

Tell me lies… by Rodney D. Robbins MA CADC III, LPC Intern.

Tell me lies… Tell me sweet little lies… A song by Fleetwood Mac, came to mind as I was writing this blog entry.  But first, let’s back up to the central topic which is a defense mechanism called “personal exceptionalism”.

“Personal exceptionalism can be defined as the conviction that the individual has that they are just not like other people. This type of idea can be taking to extremes. A person can believe that the rules that apply to other people do not apply to them. This may mean that the individual is prepared to engage in unwise behaviors because they believe they will be able to avoid the usual negative consequences. Personal exceptionalism can also mean that the individual refuses to consider the possibility that things that worked for other people might also work for them.”

This belief system can be highly destructive and keep the individual stuck in a very unhealthy pattern of living.  While this is clearly seen in the lives of those caught up in substance abuse, this type of mindset is also seen in the lives of individuals who are not using mood altering chemicals.  The belief that rules or standards only apply to others and that personal reasons for not living by them are legitimate is further reinforced by the “sweet little lies” we tell ourselves, and others.

Over the last 18 years of clinical practice has given me the opportunity to hear countless examples of this type of thinking.  I have heard many times the belief that use or other unhealthy behaviors is ok because “I can handle it”, or “I know what I’m doing”.  Self deception is a reinforcing process in this personal exceptionalism.  Not being honest with yourself about the true danger and damage being done must be overcome if true change is to occur.  Whether these self deceiving statements are keeping you from stopping your use, getting help for depression or anxiety, whatever the case may be, honesty is the only real path to getting healthy.

Changes in latitudes….

A blog post by Rodney D. Robbins MA CADC III

I listened to that old Jimmy Buffet tune as I started this blog entry today.  Funny how being 50 gives you pause to consider the changes that have taken place over 5 decades of life. Even changes within the last 10 years have been profound.   Changes in latitudes, changes in attitudes, nothing remains quite the same… There is a lot of truth in that line.  Let me review some of the changes I have seen working with teens over the last 20 years of clinical practice…

I started this work in 1996 as I was finishing up graduate school.  I was working for Tualatin Valley Mental Health, now Lifeworks, running their adolescent program.  At the time, referrals for teens coming in to treatment were consistently at a rate of around 4-6 evaluations a week.  Keeping up with the numbers was an exhausting task.  Over time, I eventually started First Step with an office in Newberg.  For several years I had between 20-30 teens in treatment at any given time up until around 2012-2013.  A trend began to appear which at the time led me to begin seeing adult clients as well.  As the numbers of teens began to drop, I developed a strong program of adults seeking help with their substance abuse challenges.

Over the last 3 years, the teen program has varied between 4 and 10 clients.  The question remains… What changed?  I know that as a professional in the field, I have adjusted the treatment offered to be consistent with best practices and the latest research.  So I have asked many times the question of what changed?  Well, after talking with a broad range of people including colleagues, parents, professionals in other fields, I believe I am on the road to an answer to this question… Let me share…

There have always been adults who viewed the use of marijuana and alcohol among youth as normal and harmless.  From a developmental perspective, as I recall from Dr. Foster at George Fox University, experimentation with use among teens is normal and relatively harmless most of the time.  In fact, there is research that indicates that there are social skills developed by teens who dabble in alcohol use that those who abstain do not develop.  While the behavior is illegal, the stage of development for teens includes a pushing of the limits and challenging of the social norms as they try and understand who they are and establish their own personal values.  What has in the past kept the problem use from developing was the knowledge by the teen that their parents’ attitudes and beliefs were in opposition to the abuse of substances, which provided a boundary that teens might push on, but would generally avoid violating to a point where intervention was needed.

Parental attitudes in the past typically led to intervention earlier if they discovered their teen was abusing marijuana and/or alcohol.  This is a significant change that I have noted as I explored what has changed.  There has been a marked shift taking place where adults are viewing marijuana and/or alcohol use as much less harmful as other drugs, thus, “better the youth are smoking pot or drinking alcohol than using heroin or meth”…  While there is a sort of logic to this thinking, at the same time, it is very risky given how teenagers think.  There is truth to that old saying “give them an inch, they will take a mile”.  If you permit use of one substance, in the teenage mind, this opens the door to more of that substance, or trying others.  I have had clients who are now young adults that I had seen as youth, share some very thought provoking insights… Let me share some of these comments as quoted…

“Yeah, my parents thought my marijuana use was kind of funny and harmless.. It’s not funny now that I’m sticking a needle in my arm”…  Former client who’s use started as marijuana and progressed over time to heroin.

“Marijuana use provided me with opportunities to try other things because of the people I was around”.. Former client talking about how he moved from marijuana to meth.

“My parents thought my pot use was no big deal.. Until I couldn’t stop and it became all I wanted to do”… Former client whose marijuana use resulted in no motivation.

“I really thought letting my son and his friends drink at home, where I could monitor, would be ok.. Then one of them starting having a seizure from drinking to much”… Parent who talked about what can go wrong when you facilitate drinking.

An additional change has been in referrals of teens needing treatment from schools.  I have talked with teachers, administrators, and students about changes in this area.  What I hear from teachers and administrators… “We just aren’t catching them.. We know they are using, but they are not doing it at school”.  What I hear from students… “We don’t need to use at school… We can just use at home, or the homes of friends who have parents who use and don’t care if we do”.  So what is happening is that there are many teens out there developing significant marijuana problems that are progressing and the adults in their lives are simply not viewing this as an issue.  The shifting attitudes around drug use among teens is resulting in the development of more severe abuse and dependency as it is going untreated.

A final word on prevalence.  Is there an epidemic in terms of the numbers of teens abusing drugs? There is no research to indicate that the numbers of teens abusing drugs has increased.  However, what we are seeing among those who do develop a drug problem is this.  The problems they are developing are more severe, and they are not getting the help they need while it is in earlier stages.  The problem is not being addressed, or if it is, it is the same as waiting until the cancer is stage 3 before we start treatment.  This will have a profound impact on our society in the years to come.

A word about Anxiety

By Rodney D. Robbins MA CADC III

First Step Treatment Center

 

Over the years of providing treatment a common cycle presents itself early on in the treatment process.  An individual comes in motivated to follow through on a decision to quit using, only to experience a flood of difficult emotions around 30 days into treatment.  The most common negative emotions are boredom and anxiety.  In this blog entry, I will
address anxiety.

During active use, one of the “benefits” to the user is the reduction or avoidance of anxiety that comes from life in general.  Anxiety triggers what is known as the “fight or flight” response in the central nervous system.  Anxiety can be triggered by either past events of “potential” future events that may, or may not ever become a reality.  In either case, anxiety, once activated, is very uncomfortable.  The user learns very early on in their
relationship with the drug that anxiety can be quickly medicated and reduced temporarily.  Unfortunately, the anxiety undoubtedly returns and often more severe due to both physiological and emotional reasons.

Upon cessation of use, there is an initial feeling of relief the user feels as the drug leaves their body.  The individual will often experience this almost euphoric feeling as their body begins to function again without the drug.  A feeling of being clean!  Senses return to normal, and the individual begins to notice things they had become “numb” to.  The problem is that this renewed sense of awareness is not exclusive to positive things.  Those people and circumstances that were anxiety producers to begin with are also still there.  In fact, this heightened sense of awareness results in them being even more noticeable!

This creates a very common problem for individuals around a month or so in treatment!  Relapse!  Without adequate support and work on coping skills for anxiety, this process is very uncomfortable for the individual and leaves them feeling as hopeless and disappointed as they were when they began the treatment process.

If you have experienced this roller coaster ride, you are not crazy! You are normal!  This is a process not unusual for those trying to quit.  Treatment providers such as myself work with individuals to help them through this process to achieve success in quitting!

Sometimes, what individuals need to hear is that they are not crazy or abnormal!

If you are reading this and are struggling, or know someone who is trying to quit, I encourage you to seek help! This process can be changed.  J

 

 

Residential or outpatient? That is the question…

Residential or outpatient? That is the question…

By Rodney D. Robbins MA CADC III

I regularly get calls from the community during which the individual on the other end is seeking residential care for themselves or a loved one.  Whether or not the individual needs residential is another question entirely.  Many out there automatically assume that is the treatment method of first choice.  Shows like “intervention” have not helped with this perception.  Intervention shows the most severe of substance use disorders for dramatic effect, and for those individuals, clearly, residential is a needed step given the amount of damage that has been done to themselves and those around them.  But residential is a step of last resort, not first.

Whether or not someone is referred to residential care is determined through a careful
evaluation with the individual, and often, family members.  This information is then looked at through the ASAM criteria (American Society of Addiction Medicine) which has clear protocols and guidelines.  There are six dimensions of functioning that are carefully examined using these criteria to decide what level of care is most appropriate.  The most recent publication of the ASAM criteria has made residential even more difficult to clinically justify, and for good reason.

Treatment is recommended to be used in stages of severity.  The lowest level, .5, is for education only, similar to diversion.  Level 1 is outpatient care, and is relatively low frequency and intensity.  This level if designed to give clinical treatment while the individual functions within the community.  Level 2.1 is Intensive Outpatient Care, and can require up to 6+ hours of treatment per week for adolescent, and 9+ hours per week for adults.  Use of outpatient treatment is a precondition for any referral to residential care unless there are clinical factors that would alter this decision.  An individual must be unable to achieve abstinence in an outpatient facility before any referral to a residential program is made.  One of the reasons for this is the reality that once you have used residential, what more structured treatment option do you have?  Additionally, residential care is very disruptive to the individual and their family, and only postpones the inevitable reality that you have to figure out how to stay clean where you are going to live!  Some opt to go to residential, and not return.  That is not always an option.

The point of this blog entry is to encourage anyone reading to avoid making decisions that require careful clinical consideration.  Seek out professional help when making such a life altering decision.  Both outpatient and residential levels of care have their designed purpose, strengths and weaknesses.  Use of any form of treatment is an individualized decision made only after careful evaluation.

Thank you for reading.

Empowering those affected

9/19/16

Empowering those affected

It’s Monday the 19th, and the morning is clearly an indicator that fall is quickly approaching. While working in my office I received a telephone call from a mom who lives outside of Yamhill County. This mom who I will refer to as Jennifer for confidentiality reasons was not unlike many calls I have received over the years. Having a 13 year old daughter who is currently using marijuana regularly, ignoring rules and limits, is refusing to go to school, and possibly selling as well. I listened as this mom shared with me the reality of her situation having a 13 year old and limited options.

Jennifer went on to share that she has called multiple places for help. Residential programs informed her that they will not take her daughter unless she is willing to be admitted. This is a daunting criteria given that most teenagers who need inpatient level of treatment are not overjoyed at the prospect of going to a residential program. Her efforts to use school attendance as a hammer is limited as the current laws punish the parents with fines if their son/daughter refuses to attend.

This situation is not unlike what many experience who are trying to live with or around a loved one who is in the cycle of addiction. The feelings of powerlessness and frustration are often overwhelming. My advice to Jennifer was to start with taking care of herself! Go to Alanon! Seek some personal counseling. Start with making sure illegal substances are not in the home. Begin seekin
g options using various community resources for additional support. At the First Step office, we are now offering a therapeutic support group for individuals just like Jennifer. A place where they can receive support and professional guidance around addiction and options for further help.

While ensuring that help is available to those with substance use disorders, we need to also make sure that those affected are not forgotten along the way.

Romancing The Drug

 By Rodney D. Robbins MA CADC III

Romancing the drug… The onset of “addiction goggles”.

Thank you for visiting the First Step website. My last article highlighted some of the personality changes that take place during the course of a substance abuse and/or dependent relationship with either a drug or some other unhealthy behavior. I wish to expand upon this process.

One way to look at this process is to see the use of a mood altering chemical as the beginning of a relationship. Like with any relationship, early on, it is typically rather casual. You see each other now and again, and when you are together, the laughs and emotional connectedness leave you with the desire to continue spending time with each other. Early on in this relationship, the times are good, the emotions pleasant, and a bond is formed between the drug and the user creating positive memories that will not be forgotten.

During this relationship process, for the individual who will develop an abuse/dependent relationship with the drug, the individual develops “addiction goggles”. Borrowing the term from the “beer goggles” expression, the same idea fits with this model as well. The individual begins to see the consequences and effects of the drug in their life through these “addiction goggles”. Just like any relationship that is important to the individual, the drug is defended, spoken well of, and protected from criticism or any perceived judgment. Negative consequences that are experienced will not be connected in any way to the drug, but rather, excused away as being caused by some other person, event or circumstance. That DUI was not because of my drinking to much and being impaired, it was because the police were out to get me! I was not puking in the bathroom at 3:00 am because I drank to much, it was because I had a touch of food poisoning, or a touch of the flu. I have even heard in my clinical process clients tell me that the problem with their use was that others had a problem with their use.

These addiction goggles, as long as they are worn, will always seek to see the good times, and ignore the bad. They will idealize the drug and it’s positive effects, avoiding recognition of the bad times. The excuses, rationalizations, and justifications that come from the addiction goggle view point will contribute to significant frustration within those around the individual. This will of course contribute to a further reinforcement of how the addiction goggles see the drug. This will also lead to an avoidance of those who do not share the same viewpoint as the wearer.

The key to achieving recovery in part lay in removing the addiction goggles and seeing this relationship with the drug for what it really is. An all consuming pattern of destruction that seeks to ultimately terminate the individual either intellectually, emotionally, spiritually, or physically.

Thank you for reading…

Personality Changes

 

First Step Adolescent and Adult Treatment Center

Rodney D. Robbins MA CADC III

Program Director

Personality Changes that accompany substance abuse/dependence.

I posted  a sample of my thoughts on the First Step  Facebook Page about the changes that take place within the substance abusing individual.  These thoughts were inspired by the work of noted Psychiatrist Carl Jung, whose work inspired much of the structure of the AA program.  His understanding of addiction in the early 1900’s goes beyond seeing drug addiction as simply a pleasure seeking behavioral response.

We all, at our core, seek meaning.  We want to have a sense of self, and that we matter.  As our personality develops, we also take on sets of values.  We also have within us a drive to seek pleasure, and reduce pain.  These are all normal developmental features and characteristics.  The abuse of mood altering chemicals interferes with this process.  For some, as drug use continues, the user experiences a substance induced “wholeness”.  As Jung put it… “The wholeness that comes with intoxication is an illusory wholeness with a numinous power which dissolves when one sobers up. So the search to repeat the experience begins, and it is not one that is readily given up.”

In my clinical practice, I have heard this stated by clients many times.  They begin to feel “whole” when under the influence, and when sober, feel fragmented and in a sense, lost.  This is a gradual process that slowly seduces the individual into a deeper relationship with the process of addiction.  In clinical terms, this is called “use to feel normal”.

Past and current research demonstrates that substance abuse and addiction do indeed change the personality of the user over time.  As use continues, the user increasingly experiences a compromising of values, further loss of self (except when using), and altered personality.  This can be seen in a variety of ways.  Changes in friends and relationships, shifting priorities, activities and goals.  Noticeable changes in relationships with those close to you.  This can be a very frustrating time as the user will often feel like they are the one not being understood.  They are the one being “attacked”.  When in reality, they are the one who is changing, not the family members or those around them. This is part of the continued process of the “addicted” self becoming a dominant aspect of the personality.

Something to think about….

If you, the reader, are a substance user, I encourage you to consider the following…

As you look back on your life, can you identify any activities, values, priorities or relationships that have changed along with your continued use?  How do you feel about those changes?  How do others around you feel about those changes?

Difficult questions to consider.. The good news is that with rigorous honesty and help, you can get better.

Please visit www.firststeptreatmentcenter.com for more information about First Step Adolescent and Adult Treatment Center.

The problem with counting days in recovery…

 

Rodney D. Robbins MA CADC III, Program Director, First Step Adolescent and Adult Treatment Center. 6/17/16

Let me start by saying that I am not a recovering individual, therefore, my opinion on this topic are certainly from a different perspective than what you might here from a Substance Abuse Professional who is.  The intent of this article is not to say anyone is doing  it “wrong”, but rather, to offer up another perspective on this subject.

Having worked with addicted and substance abusing individuals for the last 19 years has given me a broad range of experiences as well as time reading the research that has led me to have concerns around the importance placed on counting recovery time.  I wish to share some of these thoughts with the readers of this blog…

The issues that come to mind fall in these categories…

1. Understanding of addiction as a disease.
2. Personal impact from a lapse, or relapse.
3. Common outcomes from a use that occurs after a period of abstinence.
4. Impact of day counting on relapse potential.
5. My personal thoughts.

 

The field of addiction has worked for years, along with the recovery community, to educate others around this disease.  There has been significant resistance to this idea!  In the past, addiction was treated as a mental disorder along with other serious conditions often resulting in placement in asylums or other types of clinics.  Addiction was also seen as a “moral” failure, and the individual treated as deficient.  We now understand addiction as being a disease that impacts the thinking and behavior of the individual in highly damaging ways.  Are there moral failures that often accompany addictive use? Yes, absolutely.  Is the individual any more deficient morally? Not really.. The behaviors are certainly damaging in a number of ways.  But what we have seen repeatedly is that once the disease is brought into remission, the individual will show significant changes in their thinking and behavior, no longer operating in the same manner as before.

Because we know that addiction is a chronic, relapsing disease, we understand that the risk of a lapse or relapse always remains a real potential in the life of the individual.  To underestimate this reality puts the individual at significant risk of a repeated use.  It is my opinion that to not keep this in mind removes addiction from a disease into the category of a moral process.  The person relapsed not because their craving brain led to altered thinking and a desire to use, but rather, they were simply being selfish.  Which is not necessarily the case.  A desire to use again is a process that goes beyond the moral centers of the brain, and are more influenced by deeper processes of survival from the perspective of the disease.

How the individual is impacted by a lapse after a long period of abstinence certainly varies from person to person.  However, a consistent pattern I have witnessed is a deep shame that profoundly impacts the individual when they lose a significant amount of clean time through a return to use.  This feeling of shame and failure is compounded by the individual’ personal thinking, as well as the response of society.  This may be a matter of perception, or a real rejection by those around the individual in reaction to the use.  This feeling of shame and failure can in some cases have lethal consequences depending upon the response of the individual.  It is my opinion that the danger of counting days is the same as trying to drive a vehicle by staring in the rearview mirror.  There is a reason the rearview mirror is smaller than the windshield!  The most important clean date, in my opinion, is today.  As the saying goes, “yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift”.  This is not in any way meaning to devalue the amount of clean time an individual has.  Rather, it is intended to encourage the individual in recovery to appreciate the past clean time, but do not rest your serenity upon it!  The most important day of recovery is today!  While disappointment is normal and healthy when one has a relapse, seeing past clean time as the building blocks to continued recovery is more useful than seeing it as “lost time”!

One of the unfortunate common outcomes of a relapse after a period of abstinence is the desire to give up, and/or escape.  The addictive thinking returns rapidly, and leads to justifications to simply continue use as the “clean time is lost anyway”.  The individual often experiences so much shame, that they choose the least healthy response.  One of the reasons for treatment that lasts 6 months or more being more effective is this process!  The individual has a safety net to help them get back up if there is a lapse or relapse.  What often happens is that individuals complete shorter programs, have a relapse, and feel such shame that they do not return to treatment or seek a recovery program.

As for day counting, I believe this is the same as watching your feet while riding a bike.  While there is certainly value in recognizing 30 days, 60 days, etc… I believe that becoming preoccupied with day counting is focusing on the sobriety, and not enough on serenity.

In summary, it is my opinion that to reduce the shame often associated with a lapse after a period of sobriety, consider shifting the focus from the amount of time spent clean, and live by the mantra “one day at a time”!  If you do have a use, instead of seeing it as a loss of clean time, focus on what you learned during your period of abstinence, and use that to begin anew.  Relapse is not a moral failure!  It is the symptom of a cunning, baffling, and deadly disease that can never be cured, but can be put into remission.

Drug use and public health

 

As a community based outpatient substance use disorder treatment program, First Step Treatment Center looks at this particular health issue as a public health problem.  In order to address this problem, there are multiple barriers that must be considered.  This blog entry is a brief look at the extent of the problem, and steps that are being taken to address it.

As of 2013, the population of Yamhill County was 100,725.  The use rates for marijuana were 18%, and drugs other than marijuana 10% (within the last 30 days).  The use rates for alcohol “binge drinking” were 26% for adults and 28% for high school 11^th graders.  This data comes from the Yamhill County Public Health Community Assessment, 2013.  http://hhs.co.yamhill.or.us/sites/default/files/fileattachments/yamhill_county_community_health_assessment.pdf

As stated in the article “Illicit drug use by adults is defined as using at least one of the following substances in the past 30 days: Top graph: marijuana or hashish. Bottom graph: cocaine (including “crack”), inhalants, hallucinogens (including PCP and LSD), heroin, or any nonmedical use of analgesics, tranquilizers, stimulants, or sedatives. Illicit drug use has a major impact on individuals, families, and communities. The effects of illicit drug use are cumulative, significantly contributing to costly social, physical, mental, and public health problems. Substance abuse impacts a number of negative health outcomes such as cardiovascular conditions, pregnancy complications, HIV/AIDS, teen pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases, domestic violence, child abuse, motor vehicle crashes, homicide and suicide (Healthy People 2020).”

While the percentages may seem small, this is survey data dependent upon self reports of use.  Also, keep in mind, reported use in the last 30 days does not necessarily indicate the person has an actual substance use disorder.

What we do know is that within Yamhill County, over the last few years, we have seen a significant growth in opiate abuse that is not just a local, but also a national problem.  Currently, the state of Oregon is taking steps to increase funding to treat this growing problem.  Opiate abuse comes in various forms to include prescription pain medication, and other illegal substances.  This problem continues to increase as reported by multiple agencies including law enforcement, schools, medical, and other service providers.  The problem has reached levels so concerning that we now have law enforcement officers being trained in the use of Naloxone to combat overdoses.

https://www.facebook.com/permalink.php?story_fbid=1652825648332236&id=1552551878359614

One of my consistent messages has always been that the opiate epidemic in part needs to be treated by addressing the abuse of mood altering substances before it reaches the level of opiates.  Not all individuals who use other substances will become an opiate abuser, however, I have rarely met an opiate dependent individual who did not first abuse other substances.

Within Yamhill County, we are fortunate to have a Health and Human Services Department that takes this problem very seriously.  Steps being taken include working with providers to ensure that OHP funding is adequate for those eligible to cover services to treat substance use disorders.  There are still many in the community that are simply not aware that they are eligible for OHP, and that it covers treatment for medical, mental health and substance use disorders.  At First Step, we are fortunate that we take OHP and other forms of private insurance giving us the ability to provide services to a broad range of individuals in the community.  As a community, we must all work together to combat this growing problem that is so detrimental to all of us.

Validation

By Rodney D. Robbins MA CADC III

 

One of the driving factors of addiction, among several, is the need for validation.  Let’s start with the actual definition…

verb (used with object), validated, validating.

1.to make valid; substantiate; confirm:
Time validated our suspicions.

2.to give legal force to; legalize.

3.to give official sanction, confirmation, or approval to, as elected officials, election procedures, documents, etc.:

 Validation brings with it legitimacy.

It is my clinical opinion that the need to feel a sense of “validation” is at least in part at the root of addiction.  We all like to matter.  We ultimately need to have a sense of feeling approval.

There are many sources from which the individual seeks validation.  An often primary source comes from our parents and immediate family.  Finding validation from within the family is healthy, and if this is withheld, the individual can easily be traumatized or go through life feeling as though they are of without value.

The social group is yet another source of validation.  Who we surround ourselves with has a significant impact on how validated we may, or may not feel.  If we are validated for unhealthy behaviors, they are likely to continue.  The reverse is also true.  If we are validated for healthy behaviors, these are likely to continue.

Basically, we all want to matter.. To count for something.  If this need has not been filled, we will seek a remedy to the emptiness that is left behind.  I had a client once tell me “what I was seeking in my addiction, I found in my recovery”.  For the individuals I work with, substance use was a path to temporarily numbing the pain that comes from not feeling like they matter.  Early on, involvement with substances is much more innocent.   However, as the negative consequences of use personally, and around them, began to accumulate, a growing feeling of being worthless continued to grow like a slow cancer.  Subtle at first, but gaining tempo as the use progressed.  Over time, both the use, and the feeling of invalidation led to gradual exclusive contact with only those who also use and feel the same way, thus compounding the process.  This is typically a slow progression, subtle, and often the individual is not completely aware of the deeper processes that are taking place.

Essentially, for those whose use develops into a diagnosable substance use disorder, the deeper need of validation becomes a driving force in their dependence.  A continued pursuit of coping with the pain that comes from these powerful feelings of deeper despair drives this ongoing cycle.  The need to feel valid is strong, and will ultimately be met one way or another.

It is my personal opinion that true validation that satisfies the deepest need comes from a relationship with God.  Along with this spiritual awakening, achieving abstinence and a recovery process free of the abuse of mood altering chemicals will lead to finding the validation that we all truly want.

I am seeing many individuals doing the deeper work of exploring both what it was that damaged their sense of validation, and how to repair it.  You do not have to go through life constantly feeling like you have no value, or do not matter.

Your value before God is a constant, regardless of what you have done.  Substance use will never fill the void that God was meant to fill.